Simple Critical Miss Table for Hand-to-Hand Weapons

[This article is part of a series of system neutral Six-Sided Critical Miss Tables.]

There is something about rolling on a critical miss table that adds a dimension of fun to failure. When you roll the worst possible number you could possibly roll for an attack, something interesting ought to happen, preferably something that underscores the imperfections in all of us and the potential for humorous results. Not all games are blessed with these wondrous tables of combat mishaps, so for the next few days I shall be sharing some simple critical miss tables that may be used in any game involving physical combat.

The first table is for use with hand-to-hand weapons:

Critical Miss Table for Hand-to-Hand Weapons
1d6	Result
1	Drop weapon in front.
2	Drop weapon behind.
3	Weapon flies 1d6 meters in random direction.
4	Weapon flies 2d6 meters in random direction.
5	Weapon breaks against nearby object.
6	Injure self with weapon.

The direction of flight for weapons that become airborne may be determined with 1d6 for hexes, 1d8 for squares (including diagonal movement), or a compass die. (A compass die is a d8 with the points of the compass instead of numerals, i.e. N, E, S, W, NE, SE, SW, NW. You can also just roll a d8 and substitute the directions for the numerals, e.g. 1=N, 2=E, 3=S, 4=W, 5=NE, 6=SE, 7=SW, 8=NW.)

N.B. I should mention that this table was inspired by a critical hit table found in Stormbringer, an excellent role-playing game published by Chaosium, Inc.

[Originally posted in Fudgery.net/fudgerylog on 18 May 2011.]